Men are traditionally the breadwinners, while women tend to the children and household, but times are changing. A great deal of women also have full time jobs as well. A woman’s day never ends. And sometimes, quite honestly, we could use some help around the house. But what you should do when you have a lazy husband who just wants to lounge around after work and during the weekends?
When you wear a bitch face, you do it for a reason because modern day women work really hard at running and maintaining a household. We are essentially a maid, full time-parent, cook, housekeeper, laundry-attendant, chauffeur, bookkeeper, gardener... you name it, we do it! And a good majority of us also work outside the home, or have a full or part time work-from-home job in addition to all of the above duties. We are busy from the time we wake up till the moment we close our eyes at night. However, our husbands might not always see this.
Beautiful women have to figure out how to manage everything within 24 hours, while our husbands work all day and then come home, eat dinner and just want to relax. We’re just as tired as they are, but they don’t always see this. We really would love if they would help with the housework, or at least keep up with what they consider “manly” work: household repairs, mowing the lawn, and the like. The worst thing you can do is go around saying “My husband is lazy.” We need to do a little gentle manipulation, maybe even use a little “reverse psychology.” Men have fragile egos underneath that tough exterior so yelling and copping an attitude will only make things worse. Here are some tips on how to handle a lazy husband.
1. Try to catch him in a good mood
You know your husband well enough not to push his buttons. Wait until he’s in a good mood before you ask him for some help with the kids or around the house. If he had a really bad day at work and is in a foul mood, you might want to wait until a better time.
Do not blurt out what you need. Gently ask him if he minds helping you out for a bit. Don’t come at him guns blazing. You want to keep him in a good mood, not ruin it. You know the old saying “You catch more flies with sugar than you do with honey.” Don’t hand him a “honey-do” list the second he walks in the door. Give him time to relax and unwind. You’ll both be happier in the long run.
2. Readily accept his help, even when it isn’t really needed
You probably have also heard the saying “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.” If your normally lazy husband suddenly asks if you there is anything he can do, or offers to wash the dishes or take the kids to soccer practice, jump at the chance. Even if it’s something you were just about to do, enjoy doing or even if it’s something simple, take the chance when it comes around. And don’t forget to thank him afterward and tell him how much you appreciate it. This makes him feel good about himself and ultimately puts the odds in your favor that he will offer again if you let him know how much it means.
3. Don’t fix his “mistakes”
You probably like things done a certain way. Everything has its own place and you thrive on organization. Accept the fact that your husband right now share your love of color-coordinating the clothes, or stacking the bowls in a certain order. You might not be crazy about the way he washes the dishes or folds the clothes, but “beggars can’t be choosers.” Don’t follow him around nagging him or instantly “redo” what he has just done. This will put you both in a bad mood and he will be less likely to offer his assistance again if you are constantly nagging him or complaining about his work.
4. Don’t be bossy. You are his partner, not his supervisor
Going with the above, men do not like to be told what to do constantly. They most likely hear that at work all day. Also, they don’t want to feel like they are living with a mother rather than a wife. If you want to make a “honey do” list, don’t force it on him. Ask him sweetly if he has the time to help, or can he possibly handle a few of these items when he has some free time. He will be more likely to help if you ask him sweetly, rather than try to boss him around and bully or threaten him into helping you with household chores.
5. Remain patient and calm, even when he messes up
Losing your patience is the last thing you want to do. If you want your husband to help, do not lose your calm, even if he is making a complete mess instead of helping. Walk away for a few minutes until you’re calm. Sometimes if you let out a deep sigh, men will catch the hint and realize they have pushed your buttons before it’s too late. If you get upset then so will he and the entire plan will backfire in your face. Remain calm to maintain the peace if you want to cure a lazy husband.
6. Do not raise your voice
Yelling is the worst thing you can do. Most men will block you out immediately, ignore you, walk away and leave the work unfinished or worse, yell back and start an argument. Yelling only escalates things... quickly.
Be loving and supportive and maintain a normal tone of voice. Things will go much smoother if you keep your temper.
7. Accept his limitations
Even if you and your husband are extremely compatible, you are not going to be carbon copies of one another. Accept that he will not be able to read your mind. You won’t always be satisfied with the way he vacuums or cleans the bathroom. However, accept the help where and when you get it and life will be easier for both of you.
If you really don't like the way he does a particular chore, find something else he is good at and do that one yourself. Don’t ask for trouble.
8. Show him you appreciate him
The main way to cure a lazy husband is to let him know how much you appreciate him. Everyone likes to be told they are appreciated and men are no exception. For some men a simple hug or thank you will do. Others will need a little more, maybe give him a back massage or bake his favorite dessert. You know your husband so do what works best for you.